I have the most amazing calendar which predicts my mindset or mood every single month.
Everything I've done, has only made me more ashamed of who I am. I can't think of a moment where I was never embarrassed by my actions. Sometimes I feel so lousy I feel like I don't deserve any love from anybody.
I have been dreaming of things lately and it bothers me a whole lot. They are very random people in my dream who make me feel inferior, who make me feel unloved, who make me feel like I'm such an idiot who should never be loved, who should be thrown to a corner and left alone. And for the past two days I've been feeling so lousy, I don't know what's wrong with me.
When will I get out of the dark room? Maybe it's even darker out there.
Save that one glance for me. But I know you wouldn't even know I was there. Because I'm just that grey pillar right beside.